Celebrations

Lunch for Friends

Yesterday some good friends visited for the afternoon, a good time was had by all.

Festive Health & Safety Warning!!

I received this via email yesterday and everyone had a good chuckle about it.

Enjoy 😉

Anyone planning to dash through the snow in a one horse open sleigh, going over the fields and laughing all the way are advised that a Risk Assessment will be required, addressing the safety of an open sleigh for members of the public. This assessment must also consider whether it is appropriate to use only one horse for such a venture, particularly where there are multiple passengers.

Please note that permission must also be obtained in writing from landowners before their fields may be entered. To avoid offending those not participating in celebrations, we would request that laughter is moderate only and not loud enough to be considered a noise nuisance.

Benches, stools and orthopedic chairs are now available for collection by any shepherds planning or required to watch their flocks at night. While provision has also been made for remote monitoring of flocks by CCTV cameras from a centrally heated shepherd observation hut, all users of this facility are reminded that an emergency response plan must be submitted to account for known risks to the flocks and any lone working undertaken by more traditional shepherds in remote locations.
The angel of the Lord is additionally reminded that, prior to shining his/her glory all around, s/he must confirm that all shepherds are wearing appropriate Personal Protective Equipment to mitigate the harmful effects of UVA, UVB and the overwhelming effects of Glory.

Following last year’s well-publicised case, everyone is advised that equal opportunities legislation prohibits any comment with regard to the redness of any part of Mr R. Reindeer. Further to this, exclusion of Mr R. Reindeer from reindeer games will be considered discriminatory and disciplinary action will be taken against those found guilty of this offense.

While it is acknowledged that gift bearing is a common practice in various parts of the world, particularly the Orient, everyone is reminded that the bearing of gifts is subject to Hospitality Guidelines and all gifts must be registered. This applies regardless of the individual, even Royal personages. It is particularly noted that direct gifts of currency or gold are specifically precluded, while caution is advised regarding other common gifts such as aromatic resins that may evoke allergic reactions.

Finally, in the recent instance of the infant found tucked up in a manger without any crib for a bed, Social Services have been advised and will be arriving shortly!

Time to Relax…

I have had a hectic few days (again…).  In the past couple of weeks the kitchen and the dining room have been decorated. This  involved emptying the dining room and returning everything to it’s place before visitors arrived to stay over the weekend.  It was almost back in one piece before they arrived on Saturday, but not quite!

There was a busy itinerary whilst my visitors were with me;  Attingham Park, evening dinner at Mum’s, Daniels mill (I remembered my camera this time), Dudmaston Hall, Much Wenlock and a Sunday evening meal out.  On the morning of their departure (Monday) my visitors got up unexpectedly early leaving me feeling rather spaced out.  Their early departure did however leave me with plenty of time to get ready for my afternoon ‘bloggy meet up’.

Ginnie (from Vision & Verb) and Astrid were visiting the UK and had arranged a meet up with friends who blog at Shutterchance.  You might recall I met them both at the Black Country Museum last year.  This year they had arranged the meet up at Blists Hill museum, which is not far from Ironbridge.  It was so lovely to see them both (and the other shutterchancers) again.  We all had a fun afternoon together exploring Blists Hill, chatting and getting to know each other better.  Oh! I nearly forgot, we all took lots of photos too 😉

I booked today off to relax, but…

The day was taken up washing glasses and ornaments before returning them to the dining room.  I moved some furniture around too, to make better use of the room.  I am pleased with the result 🙂

A Game or Two

I invite you to join me at Vision & Verb where I share my life long enjoyment of board games.

A Bit of a Laugh ;-)

I am in the middle of writing my next V&V post, which led me to search for some information that I knew was on my previous Blog. Whilst browsing around I found this and couldn’t resist re-posting it, complete with original photo 🙂

I am sure this will be controversial but it made me laugh 😉

You might not have known this, but a lot of inanimate objects are actually either male or female.
Here are some examples:-

FREEZER BAGS:
They are male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them.

PHOTOCOPIERS:
These are female, because once turned off, it takes a while to warm them up again. They are an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can also wreak havoc if you push the wrong buttons.

TYRES:
Tyres are male, because they go bald easily and are often over inflated.

HOT AIR BALLOONS:
Also a male object, because to get them to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under their arse.

SPONGES:
These are female, because they are soft, squeezable and retain water.

WEB PAGES:
Female, because they’re constantly being looked at and frequently getting hit on.

TRAINS:
Definitely male, because they always use the same old lines for picking up people.

EGG TIMERS:
Egg timers are female because, over time, all the weight shifts to the bottom.

HAMMERS:
Male, because in the last 5000 years, they’ve hardly changed at all, and are occasionally handy to have around.

THE REMOTE CONTROL:
Female. Ha! You probably thought it would be male, but consider this: It easily gives a man pleasure, he’d be lost without it, and while he doesn’t always know which buttons to push, he just keeps trying.

Your Age by Chocolate Math

This is pretty neat so please don’t cheat by scrolling down first!
It will take you less than a minute and is fun (especially for chocoholics).
Work it out as you go along.  Calculators are allowed!

1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to have chocolate (more than once but less than 10)

2. Multiply this number by 2

3. Add 5

4. Multiply it by 50 — I’ll wait while you get the calculator

5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1759 and if you haven’t , add 1758

6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born

You should have a three digit number, the first digit of this was your original number (i.e., how many times you want to have chocolate each week).

The next two numbers are…

YOUR AGE 😉

The Chocolate Calculator – spread the word 🙂

H/T Pupazz

Busy Weekend

I eventually managed to get to see Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. It was well worth the wait, although I could have done without all the interruptions from people frequently leaving and entering the cinema throughout the film. The essence of the book was captured very well, but I think some bits of the film would be confusing if you hadn’t read the book.  A must for any Harry Potter fan.

Before the film I just had to have a go at the new indoor mini golf course.  There are actually two 18 hole courses and obviously the more difficult of the two had to be tested.  I thought I was doing quite badly but I managed to finish 10 shots in the lead 😉

After the film it was time for a bit to eat and I had a delicious tuna steak with risotto and veg.

I do hope you all like the sky I enjoyed on my journey home.

And what is in store for me tomorrow? Well that is another day 😉

The Barber's Revenge

Angus commented on my previous post suggesting he might like to take the barber up on the offer of a free haircut.  After seeing the type of styles that particular barber produces, I think Angus may change his mind 😉

Community Service

One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut he asked about his bill and the barber replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’

The florist was pleased and left the shop.

When the barber went to open his shop the next morning there was a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.

Later, a policeman came in for a haircut, and when he tried to pay his bill, the barber again replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’

The policeman was happy and left the shop.

The next morning when the barber went to open up there was a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen doughnuts waiting for him at his door.

A university professor came in for a haircut and when he tried to pay his bill, the barber once again replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’

The professor was very happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber opened his shop, there was a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen different books such as ‘How to Improve Your Business’ and ‘Becoming More Successful.’

Then, a Member of Parliament came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill the barber again said, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’

The Member of Parliament was very happy and left the shop.

The next morning when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen Members of Parliament lined up waiting for a free haircut.

And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the Members of Parliament.